By — Xandrine Foxfire

Have you ever owned something that wasn’t meant for you? Something that brought you genuine joy but probably not for the intended purpose?

This is a salt brick. My sister came home one day and dropped this brick in my lap, and she went “I think this is meant for goats, but I feel like you’d like it.” After the pain of having a brick dropped in my lap subsided, I realized she was absolutely correct. I adore this salt brick. It’s almost certainly not meant for humans, but at least three of my friends have licked it (pre-pandemic and on different sides, though I don’t know why I’m defending the act of licking your friend’s personal belongings). My salt brick sits all happy on my shelf, a pleasant little pillar for me to set other objects on top of.

It’s claimed that himilayan pink salt is supposed to cleanse the air in a home, and while I don’t really think this brick is doing anything in terms of air quality, it is a dandy little item to have. It’s just a brick! On my shelf! A funky fresh friend that gives off good vibes just by existing.

It’s also just… genuinely exciting to own a salt brick. You have a salt lamp? Wicked. I have a brick! Her name’s Conk Crete. I hope you have a nice day. Sometimes when people come over and ask about my salt brick I give it a funky background story, like “Oh, my salt brick? Ha, I was just… outside… and there she was.” or I’ll say “I met her in the metaphysical section of a Barnes & Noble, and now we live together.” Just because it makes me laugh. Just because it makes my friends look at me a little funny. That’s my salt brick! I don’t need a reason to own it, aside from the fact that it makes me smile. Good brick. Magic lady.

When I asked my sister where she got it, she said “Uhhhh… I think from Tractor Supply Co.- it was less than $10.” I think that’s enough of a reason to buy a brick. I hope you all invest in a salt brick, they spark joy.